Emotion determines what is in your heart today. Did you know that you can decide which emotions you experience? Emotions are not universal human responses to worldly experiences. Emotions depend on the thinker. A terrorist is happy that a bomb goes off, a sane person isn’t. Emotions at a funeral are not universal. Not everybody feels the same about the person who died or death.
Emotions are, for the unevolved, beyond the reach of their conscious life. Emotions do overwhelm us when we are trapped between what we feel and what we wanted. In other words when reality is compared to expectations, emotions express how we feel about it.
If you get news that compliments your expectations you’re over the moon. Emotions are good. If you get news that condemns your expectations to the garbage or even threatens them, you’ll be flabbergasted and even depressed. So, expectations have a primary role in determining emotions. Ironically, and as a coach I find it most amazing, that most people would rather suffer negative emotions than change their expectations which are really quite easy to change.
The reason for this resistance is a fight with nature. We seem to expect what we expect even if it is in complete disagreement with nature. Given that nature is a mirror of the universe and the universe a mirror of creation, it would seem that a well educated, inspired and happy person would, if all things were equal, defer to emotion as a sign that their expectations were in conflict with their heart. But no. Expectations come from our head and for most Westerners, the head rules the heart.
That’s not a bad thing. I mean business is mostly head over heart, profit over people. Relationships are head over heart, we are always on guard to do the right thing at home. Kids play sport and it’s head over heart in a competitive world. So, in a lot of competitive environments: business, career, relationships, social life, study, – head over heart explains why it’s really hard for us all to change our expectations.
But when the answer to the question “what’s in your heart today?” is not pretty, like anger or tired or stressed or worried or envious, or hate or disappointment or confusion, then maybe we’ve gone too far because what’s in your heart determines how people feel about you, your health, your sense of meaning of life. If what’s in your heart is not gratitude, presence, certainty or love, you and your expectations are at war with creation. And, well, I hate to be the one to tell you, but, well, you aren’t going to win that fight.
When consulting with someone and I say the above, the anger sometimes boils over. This fight with nature is very personal and it’s often been going on for years. It’s a determination to change the universe, so it’s something people take very seriously in spite of the obvious flaw in the argument.
People can’t lie about “what’s in their heart?” So, if the answer to this is anything but fantastic, you’d be wise to sit back and see where you and the entire universe are in conflict. Remember, what goes on inside of you is reflected in what goes on outside of you. If you say “oooo, my husband didn’t come home on time” or “ooooh my wife went out with her friends and came home late” if this is the trash that fills your heart, your ego, identity, head is ruling your heart and that’s going to lead to ill health at so many levels.
“What is in your heart today?” is probably the single most important question you can ask yourself over and over. If it’s not pleasant go to nature for a minute. In nature people’s heart tunes into the universe. People are different in nature. More generous, more open minded, more visionary, more inspired – WHY? Because in nature your heart and nature’s heart are one. Some call it healing. I call it life.