Nobody likes a try hard. I mean when somebody over cooks the smiles you know there’s a lack of authenticity. So, a real smile is an inner smile. It comes through your eyes and it happens when you are authentic. It’s called Charisma.
A Charismatic leader will draw you to his or her product automatically. They love that product. They believe in it and most importantly, don’t need you to believe in it. They love it enough for both of you.
A non charismatic leader will repell you. They are seeking your approval. They want you to like them more than they like themselves. In fact they rather you like them than their product. So their focus is not on the outcome they deliver you it is on how they feel after dealing with you. That’s the difference between walking the talk and talking the walk.
I created this Walk Your Talk process because I love to see people walk their talk. It does challenge people. Sometimes I wish people would like me as much as they like the process, but then I know I’ve slipped and I’m talking the talk, not walking the walk.
The Walker, Walk your Talker Process is really easy to learn. It helps you stay real and authentic as a person, partner and leader. Because when we don’t walk our talk we attract situations that cause us catastrophe,disasters and humbling circumstance. Like: sales downturn, misery and rejection at home.
Lets go through the process quickly:
Step 1. Discard.
Every time we get off track we get angry with someone. That’s a clear sign that we’re way off line. Anger with someone like a boss, a partner, an ex, a family member or the dentist. Doesn’t matter who, it’s the first sign that we’re not walking our talk. So, discard is about dealing with that anger and getting back into our power again. Anger feels powerful but it’s really very weak.
Step 2. Cellular… The chemistry of your body responds to you being off track long before you know you are not walking your talk. Acids build, weight is gained, joins start to ache. Undoing all that is really important for a bunch of reasons: first, you may get over the situation but your body, if not cleaned, will remember and then there’s tension which causes physical reactions to psychological drama. Ouch. Then there’s shrinkage. Ever noticed how older people seem to get smaller. That’s the body accumulating loads of memory that eventually sends it to the grave. Not necessary.
Step 3. Appearance… Goodness knows that environment plays a huge role in our mental health. It can make and break us. A smart person who is treated dumb becomes dumb. A good heart in a dark place becomes dark. So, a key feature of walking your talk is to design your environment to include the beauty of life. This is called biophilia and we pay huge attention to biophilia in helping you walk your talk. Why fight it? People are different in different spaces and so lets work with this to create a space at home and at work that helps you do what you love.
Step 4. Angels … No not really angels .. but if you want to know why people say one thing and do another this is the step for you. By understanding the thinking process of others, you also get to understand yours. Why do your new years resolutions fail and why do some commitments stick and others don’t. Walking your talk means knowing yourself really well because you don’t want to make false promises to you or anyone else for that matter. These are conversations we all need to have with ourselves. What do I want, what’s in the way?
Step 5. Vision … There are few better ways to describe the human spirit than vision. A person with a vision drops their ego and rides a different horse. A smarter horse, one they hold the reins of rather than, as with ego, a horse that drives them. The human spirit is a vision and we create seven visions – one for each of the seven areas of life. Then, we priioritise and link them. This is where authenticity begins.
Step 6. Self Talk… there’s an inner dialogue we have with ourselves that can muster great forces or shoot us in the foot. Those inner dialogues “I told you it’d fail” or “we’re on a winning streak” are really deeply embedded. In some therapies, this is the only level of intervention and it can change a life. We want the inner talk and the outer walk to line up perfectly so, you get to include a bit of NLP and a few other skills in mastering your self talk. This is the final cap.
Step 7. Make a party.