J came to me after three years of virtual abuse at the hands of his employer. He’d been sidelined, had his pay cut, was under pressure to achieve and yet, the area he was working in was offering reduced potential and lower sales margins.
J had done the only thing he knew how. He’d worked harder. This strained his relationship. He came home tired and although he felt he was making an effort, his heart and mind were usually somewhere else even on romantic moments with his partner.
J is not alone. The cost of stress at work and the illusion that harder work means better results has far reaching community impact.
J had other options:
1. Cull low priority activities in his daily work routine including creating shorter meetings and less time spent invested in panic.
2. Relax more .. It’s amazing how much more effective our decisions and choices are in our work when we are calm. In fact I’d suggest our productivity goes up 20% automatically when we don’t panic. Best relaxation is exercise.
3. Love the challenge… J spent a lot of time complaining about why he was being persecuted at work, not taking into account that he’d really been in resentment for this job for a number of years. He really quit the job years ago and had been hiding under the radar hoping for a solution to pop out of a magic meeting with someone new. Instead, J could learn to appreciate where he is, in order to get what he wants.
4. J’s home life wasn’t on track. They wanted a baby, it wasn’t happening for some reason and this placed a huge lifestyle stress over J. Literally, it never left his mind. The key here would be to link this job to the happiness at home and make sure there was a positive association between what he wanted and what he was doing.
Live with an open heart,